ok, just to catch up since I've been gone....I'm older, fatter and have less tolerance for stupidity.
Just some notes on the world.
France is out of the World Cup....this alone brings a huge smile to my face
The U.S. is still in it with an actual chance of winning a group that includes England, and as we go deeper into the tournament, the games just keep getting better and better. I can't wait to see what happens.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Evil, gnashing things with great poiiinntyy teeth
This is what I've been getting hit with on the tables lately.... http://www.intriguing.com/mp/_sounds/hg/pointy.wav
anyone have the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch ??
Diablo
anyone have the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch ??Diablo
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
I'm a horrible blogger....
it's been way too long, and I didn't even go to Vegas with the blogger army this last weekend. In my defense, I'm a pussy and was in Stateline the week before. It was fun but expect no trip report as I was in a bus with way too much booze, and not enough memory of the trip to do it justice.
Although I am not a good blogger (as you know), I actually am an extremely masterful pimp. Keeping this in mind, here's a site you should see:
Although I am not a good blogger (as you know), I actually am an extremely masterful pimp. Keeping this in mind, here's a site you should see:
Its an interesting idea for a musician to actually record his own music in it's raw form, forgoing all the bullshit recording studio attitudes, people and methods. This is how the Blues, Country, and even Rock and Roll began. No million dollar studios with 18 year old engineers that think they're smarter than you, no expensive producers who actually ARE smarter than you, or others who make you sound different on record than you do live. ANYWAY.....check out the movie on his site, he tells the story better than I could. Oh...and he's a blogger....so give him some love.
I actually WILL post here a lot sooner next time.
Peace.
Diablo
Friday, September 22, 2006
been a while....
Ok, I know it's been a while, and there STILL is no part 3 of the trip report. I didn't see a lot of hits on the site so I didn't feel like putting myself through that 2 hour ordeal (yes, 2 hours....I'm not exactly Bukowski).
I may do it sometime, but only if I get a few requests. Believe me, that trip will be etched in my mind forever...is a better phrase scarred?? Maybe.
Update: been running a bit better as I am up about $900 for the last 2 trips. Now to put it in perspective, I was one of the five guys who benefitted from the Quad Aces over Aces full of Queens. $520....nice.
No limit is a different story. I played about 2 hours a few weeks ago and I don't think I should play cash game NL anymore. I don't think I want to endure the swings. Believe it or not in 3 out of 4 hands I was beaten by pocket Aces......in a row!!! Flush over straight, then Flush over Flush, then Trip Aces over a set of 9's....oh the humanity. I am proud of the fact that I didn't kill anyone, or even get pissed......no WSOP 21 yr old antics here.....just a bit of class couple of handshakes and off to play some 3/6 Limit where I did well.
Life goes on...lets hope I can get back soon.....until then I'll blog (as usual) whenever the fuck I feel like it......Don't like it?? send a msg and let me know you're reading, or a comment would work and maybe I'll get off my ass.
Diablo
I may do it sometime, but only if I get a few requests. Believe me, that trip will be etched in my mind forever...is a better phrase scarred?? Maybe.
Update: been running a bit better as I am up about $900 for the last 2 trips. Now to put it in perspective, I was one of the five guys who benefitted from the Quad Aces over Aces full of Queens. $520....nice.
No limit is a different story. I played about 2 hours a few weeks ago and I don't think I should play cash game NL anymore. I don't think I want to endure the swings. Believe it or not in 3 out of 4 hands I was beaten by pocket Aces......in a row!!! Flush over straight, then Flush over Flush, then Trip Aces over a set of 9's....oh the humanity. I am proud of the fact that I didn't kill anyone, or even get pissed......no WSOP 21 yr old antics here.....just a bit of class couple of handshakes and off to play some 3/6 Limit where I did well.
Life goes on...lets hope I can get back soon.....until then I'll blog (as usual) whenever the fuck I feel like it......Don't like it?? send a msg and let me know you're reading, or a comment would work and maybe I'll get off my ass.
Diablo
Friday, July 21, 2006
For Peyton...help someone other than yourself today...DO IT
Want to do Something to help someone today??
Read below and click the banner
A Web Site For Peyton Peyton Novoa is a beautiful little girl who faces an uphill battle in life after the loss of her mother. After reading Peyton's story, we welcome you to read about the April 2006 soccer fundraiser event that paid tribute to Natasha Novoa's life and to her daughter Peyton's future.
Donation DetailsAll donations will be directed two ways. 70% of funds will be used to ensure Petyon is afforded a bright future The remaining 30% will go towards small cell cancer research at the National Ovarian Cancer Association. Barbara Vanderhyden is a leading ovarian cancer researcher who is willing to start a model system for small cell ovarian cancer that she can distribute to labs across Canada for comparitive studies. This means that YOUR donations will help spearhead a brand new initiative in small cell research.
*******Huge props to all the poker players and people in the poker community for doing something wonderful like this to help a little girl*******
Diablo
(not so evil today) But STILL evil.....don't get any ideas.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Friday, July 14, 2006
Day 2....Midget leprechauns and Courtney Love......
This is part two of " Vegas 6/ 8-11 1st TR, be gentle...light on Poker content"
Lunch and the Hangover from hell
After regaling the Mrs with my ridiculous phone story, she laughs a bit and is ready for lunch so the Mrs., Myself, and P decide on the Caribe' Cafe as made famous in the Tiltboys stories and several hundred other poker players trip reports. The food was as good as they say I guess, but I'm in no shape to eat, drink Coke, or apparently walk. So, as I stumble out of the cafe, it was good that I met up with some guy friends. Not that the ladies aren't great, but testosterone was needed in the room or I was going to be wearing a skirt within the next 10 minutes(and we don't want that....NO one wants that).
K and D
K and D are old bandmates and still friends from the last few years. K is my degenerate poker friend, since we are not able to visit a casino or card room without calling each other with chip counts, great hands, and beat stories. D is always fun to hang out with and can always be the brunt of jokes if need be (good to have someone else other than me in this role). These boys are in town for a bachelor party and apparently have a suite at the Aladdin/Planet Hollywood. Suite?.....Sweet, we'll be relaxing there and taking a break from the casino soon enough. Of course we haven't informed K&D, but they'll be game. Not a problem..... we're gold, Jerry.
We meet with them at the entrance to the Cafe and what do you know.....beers are in hand. I flinch at seeing a beer and opt for the Gatorade instead. Hydration is key. We have time to kill before we assemble the entire group of about 25 together for widescale domination and we decide to walk the strip towards the Aladdin to meet with K&D's friends and late arrivals into town.
O'Shea's - Midget leprechauns and Courteney Love
The five of us (Diablo, Mrs, P, K & D) roll up the strip heading towards the Aladdin where the boys say they have THE kick ass suite, and we're hijacked at the sight of O'Sheas. I don't know what it is about this place but out of the 50 trips to LV I've made, I've staggered in to this little white trash oasis at least once every trip. This time as we walk through to get out of the sun, we get phone calls wondering where to meet us. We decide that there is no place better than here to just hang, watch the World Cup and kill a bit of time til D, her friend Pam, and T and his girl can catch up.
We wander through the casino and I guess no one wants to feel the love of the dollar craps, dollar roulette or any one of the ten year old slots that they have inside, so we saunter up to the bar and we all get a drink. I didn't want to but after all, this is vegas and I'm not a pussy. Drinks are acquired and we hang just to the side of the bar near the doorway where we are about 10 feet from the street corner and just across from Caesars.
Now I personally don't notice it at first, but there is a MIDGET DRESSED AS A LEPRECHAUN in front of the casino passing out flyers and rockin the Mr. Microphone. Now usually this is a cute novelty to most people, but to myself and our group of degenerates, it's an absolute Home Run. All eyes are on "ML" now and I realize that in the state of this kind of hangover this is a scene straight from Twin Peaks. I don't mean to stare, but are you kidding me?? You can't be a midget in a leprechaun outfit with a Mr. Microphone and expect me not to stare, laugh a bit, and whatever else finds its way to my twisted mind. I didn't do this blatantly as it would be rude, but after a bit everyone else seems to move on from watching ML and all of a sudden I'm in a Midget Leprechaun trance.
It was amazing. He stood passing out flyers for God knows what in the 115 degree heat, and the evil blank stare could have cut through you like a knife. It was like watching a 80 year old carny on the goldfish booth at the midway. The amount of hatred in his eyes was unmeasurable, but as soon as someone asked to take a picture, he popped up with a huge smile (in which you could still see the hate, but huge nevertheless). It occurred to me that he was a lot like a poker player with his game face on and gettin the job done. Beautiful girls getting pictures with his head between their breasts and like a stud he just did his job. Props to you, Midget Leprechaun shill....(sing along to the tune of the"real men of genius" Bud Lite commercial) pass out the propaganda, and don't forget to smile for the pretty girls. Respect to the ML....gettin the job done through the hatred of people in general and pain. I needed to show the brother some love, so I walked up to the guy as we walked away and gave him the fist bump and the mandatory "respect" on the down low of course, didn't want to embarass him (like I could?).
Courteney Love Meets the gang
D finally meets up with us towards the end of the O'Sheas experience, and introduces her friend "Pam" to us. Again, I didn't see this coming but P gave me the elbow and said "oh crap, what's up with D's friend?? See that make up??"
I am always the first one who gets this nudge. Not that I'm slow, I'm just the only one that when someone does something stupid or looks silly is willing to call it out and most times it's quite entertaining to watch. So before D can introduce Pam around I notice that she's completely and utterly shit faced. I don't mean "I'm a bit drunk, I have to go to bed" drunk. I mean "rettihd bwanna getto pusshshhh brrratt!" drunk. Keep in mind that she's been in town for about 2 hours, and part of that was at breakfast, and it's about 2pm at this point. I make sure to introduce myself before D can. I extend my hand which she takes expecting "Hi, I'm Diablo", but instead she gets "Wow....you're really fucking drunk!". Her jaw drops as she laughs heartily, and you can basically hear a pin drop in the group...finally chuckles start flowing as I give her a hug and introduce myself and tell her I'll keep an eye on her (big mistake). She gets introduced around and after a bit of talking and getting comfortable in the group and trying to cut up on me for noticing her being drunk (another big mistake) I bust out the next volley...."what the fuck Pam, did you go to the Courtney Love school of makeup???" Howls everywhere, but She had no idea....it's a womans worst nightmare. Bad lipstick...a curse. It was smeared to the right like something had just come out of her mouth in a rubbing fashion. I call for the Mrs. compact, and she quickly remedies the situation...thank god, I wouldn't have been able to stop myself. I give her a hug and make sure she knows I'm just giving her a hard time and I'll keep a watchful eye on her for the next 15-20 minutes as we walk down to the Aladdin. We arrive safely, and then it happens....she's gone. WTF???? It was like losing a little kid in the mall, flash....she's gone. Crap.
The inquisition begins....we look around for about 20 minutes to no avail and finally D gets a call. "D, I'm going back to my hotel. Which hotel is it again???" She is informed that in fact she's staying at the IP. "ohhhh....I'm there already, but can you come and get me?" This goes back and forth for several minutes while the rest of us decide that she in fact is D's friend and we're not spending the next two hours looking for a drunken Courtney Love(she is after all 35, and a big girl). D has a look of sheer frustration on her face, and we ask "what's up?" and the conversation goes a little like this.
D--"P is back at the IP".....
Me--"Good"
D--"No, not good"
Me--"why not?"
D--"well, she IS in her own hotel but she stopped at a bar."
Me--"good for her, hopefully they'll pick up on her being wasted and escort her to her room"
D--"No, that didn't happen"
Me--"What DID happen....there's more????"
D--"Yep. She had a drink and apparently didn't want to ride the elevator because last time it was packed and she has claustrophobia"
Me--"oh shit, and........" (I have a bad feeling where this is going)
D--I don't know....."the phone just cut out and she won't answer"
Me--Dammit....."Do we need to go find her ass???"
D--"no, I'll do it. I brought her in and I'll take care of it."
Me--"that sucks....we can help you find her if you want"
D--"nope, I wouldn't do that to you guys. I should have met with her later and should have known better"
Me--"you sure...I'll look for her ass if you need.....I'm like fucking Matlock, I can find anything."
D--"no, it's cool. You're more like Magellan, you will look for 10 years and not find shit."
Me--"ok, you got me there but at least I'm offering"
D--"nah, you're good."
As we're in the middle of this, everyone else has spread out to the nickel slots and D's phone rings again. We find out that P is in fact safe, but now in a stairway sitting on a step on an unknown floor and unable to get up or out. I can't help but laugh my way into a chair and double up...I mean...A stairway....she can't get up off a stair??? BWWWHAHAHAHA.
I can now see the end of my participation at the end of the tunnel. D chats with her for a while and is confounded. No idea what to do, so she tells us she's going over to find her. "No you're not....we're not losing you for the day because your dumbass friend can't handle her liquor." I have a moment of clarity just then. "Call the IP, tell them what's up. They have cameras in those stairways. They'll find Courtney Foster Brooks and she's home free." Meanwhile P calls her husband in Phoenix as well, completely tilting him and he calls the police. She ends up falling asleep in the stairwell for just over an hour and a half as they all look for her, and finally they escort her to her room unharmed.
Aladdin Slots and the wait
===Tip of the day===
When playing nickel slots with women, if the women fill all the spots in a row of machines and you get stuck with a lame machine I.E.: "magic wand", "Ponies and Kitties", "Cupcakes in the Meadow" "Princess Daisy's dream" (you know what I'm saying....) DON'T DO IT....EVER. This is -EV every time.
As I learn this lesson on the slots, we are waiting for our buddies JG and PR to arrive via '32 coupe through the hot desert sun. They are about an hour away so the ladies start up the nickels...I don't know why, but I'm a sucker for these things. Cartoons that explode, Fish that talk, Monty Python, Austin Powers...I am under the spell.
Finally the boys arrive and we set out to start really drinking.....
Stay tuned for the next installment....Diablo meets the Planet of the Apes suite.....
Lunch and the Hangover from hell
After regaling the Mrs with my ridiculous phone story, she laughs a bit and is ready for lunch so the Mrs., Myself, and P decide on the Caribe' Cafe as made famous in the Tiltboys stories and several hundred other poker players trip reports. The food was as good as they say I guess, but I'm in no shape to eat, drink Coke, or apparently walk. So, as I stumble out of the cafe, it was good that I met up with some guy friends. Not that the ladies aren't great, but testosterone was needed in the room or I was going to be wearing a skirt within the next 10 minutes(and we don't want that....NO one wants that).
K and D
K and D are old bandmates and still friends from the last few years. K is my degenerate poker friend, since we are not able to visit a casino or card room without calling each other with chip counts, great hands, and beat stories. D is always fun to hang out with and can always be the brunt of jokes if need be (good to have someone else other than me in this role). These boys are in town for a bachelor party and apparently have a suite at the Aladdin/Planet Hollywood. Suite?.....Sweet, we'll be relaxing there and taking a break from the casino soon enough. Of course we haven't informed K&D, but they'll be game. Not a problem..... we're gold, Jerry.
We meet with them at the entrance to the Cafe and what do you know.....beers are in hand. I flinch at seeing a beer and opt for the Gatorade instead. Hydration is key. We have time to kill before we assemble the entire group of about 25 together for widescale domination and we decide to walk the strip towards the Aladdin to meet with K&D's friends and late arrivals into town.
O'Shea's - Midget leprechauns and Courteney Love
The five of us (Diablo, Mrs, P, K & D) roll up the strip heading towards the Aladdin where the boys say they have THE kick ass suite, and we're hijacked at the sight of O'Sheas. I don't know what it is about this place but out of the 50 trips to LV I've made, I've staggered in to this little white trash oasis at least once every trip. This time as we walk through to get out of the sun, we get phone calls wondering where to meet us. We decide that there is no place better than here to just hang, watch the World Cup and kill a bit of time til D, her friend Pam, and T and his girl can catch up.
We wander through the casino and I guess no one wants to feel the love of the dollar craps, dollar roulette or any one of the ten year old slots that they have inside, so we saunter up to the bar and we all get a drink. I didn't want to but after all, this is vegas and I'm not a pussy. Drinks are acquired and we hang just to the side of the bar near the doorway where we are about 10 feet from the street corner and just across from Caesars.
Now I personally don't notice it at first, but there is a MIDGET DRESSED AS A LEPRECHAUN in front of the casino passing out flyers and rockin the Mr. Microphone. Now usually this is a cute novelty to most people, but to myself and our group of degenerates, it's an absolute Home Run. All eyes are on "ML" now and I realize that in the state of this kind of hangover this is a scene straight from Twin Peaks. I don't mean to stare, but are you kidding me?? You can't be a midget in a leprechaun outfit with a Mr. Microphone and expect me not to stare, laugh a bit, and whatever else finds its way to my twisted mind. I didn't do this blatantly as it would be rude, but after a bit everyone else seems to move on from watching ML and all of a sudden I'm in a Midget Leprechaun trance.
It was amazing. He stood passing out flyers for God knows what in the 115 degree heat, and the evil blank stare could have cut through you like a knife. It was like watching a 80 year old carny on the goldfish booth at the midway. The amount of hatred in his eyes was unmeasurable, but as soon as someone asked to take a picture, he popped up with a huge smile (in which you could still see the hate, but huge nevertheless). It occurred to me that he was a lot like a poker player with his game face on and gettin the job done. Beautiful girls getting pictures with his head between their breasts and like a stud he just did his job. Props to you, Midget Leprechaun shill....(sing along to the tune of the"real men of genius" Bud Lite commercial) pass out the propaganda, and don't forget to smile for the pretty girls. Respect to the ML....gettin the job done through the hatred of people in general and pain. I needed to show the brother some love, so I walked up to the guy as we walked away and gave him the fist bump and the mandatory "respect" on the down low of course, didn't want to embarass him (like I could?).
Courteney Love Meets the gang
D finally meets up with us towards the end of the O'Sheas experience, and introduces her friend "Pam" to us. Again, I didn't see this coming but P gave me the elbow and said "oh crap, what's up with D's friend?? See that make up??"
I am always the first one who gets this nudge. Not that I'm slow, I'm just the only one that when someone does something stupid or looks silly is willing to call it out and most times it's quite entertaining to watch. So before D can introduce Pam around I notice that she's completely and utterly shit faced. I don't mean "I'm a bit drunk, I have to go to bed" drunk. I mean "rettihd bwanna getto pusshshhh brrratt!" drunk. Keep in mind that she's been in town for about 2 hours, and part of that was at breakfast, and it's about 2pm at this point. I make sure to introduce myself before D can. I extend my hand which she takes expecting "Hi, I'm Diablo", but instead she gets "Wow....you're really fucking drunk!". Her jaw drops as she laughs heartily, and you can basically hear a pin drop in the group...finally chuckles start flowing as I give her a hug and introduce myself and tell her I'll keep an eye on her (big mistake). She gets introduced around and after a bit of talking and getting comfortable in the group and trying to cut up on me for noticing her being drunk (another big mistake) I bust out the next volley...."what the fuck Pam, did you go to the Courtney Love school of makeup???" Howls everywhere, but She had no idea....it's a womans worst nightmare. Bad lipstick...a curse. It was smeared to the right like something had just come out of her mouth in a rubbing fashion. I call for the Mrs. compact, and she quickly remedies the situation...thank god, I wouldn't have been able to stop myself. I give her a hug and make sure she knows I'm just giving her a hard time and I'll keep a watchful eye on her for the next 15-20 minutes as we walk down to the Aladdin. We arrive safely, and then it happens....she's gone. WTF???? It was like losing a little kid in the mall, flash....she's gone. Crap.
The inquisition begins....we look around for about 20 minutes to no avail and finally D gets a call. "D, I'm going back to my hotel. Which hotel is it again???" She is informed that in fact she's staying at the IP. "ohhhh....I'm there already, but can you come and get me?" This goes back and forth for several minutes while the rest of us decide that she in fact is D's friend and we're not spending the next two hours looking for a drunken Courtney Love(she is after all 35, and a big girl). D has a look of sheer frustration on her face, and we ask "what's up?" and the conversation goes a little like this.
D--"P is back at the IP".....
Me--"Good"
D--"No, not good"
Me--"why not?"
D--"well, she IS in her own hotel but she stopped at a bar."
Me--"good for her, hopefully they'll pick up on her being wasted and escort her to her room"
D--"No, that didn't happen"
Me--"What DID happen....there's more????"
D--"Yep. She had a drink and apparently didn't want to ride the elevator because last time it was packed and she has claustrophobia"
Me--"oh shit, and........" (I have a bad feeling where this is going)
D--I don't know....."the phone just cut out and she won't answer"
Me--Dammit....."Do we need to go find her ass???"
D--"no, I'll do it. I brought her in and I'll take care of it."
Me--"that sucks....we can help you find her if you want"
D--"nope, I wouldn't do that to you guys. I should have met with her later and should have known better"
Me--"you sure...I'll look for her ass if you need.....I'm like fucking Matlock, I can find anything."
D--"no, it's cool. You're more like Magellan, you will look for 10 years and not find shit."
Me--"ok, you got me there but at least I'm offering"
D--"nah, you're good."
As we're in the middle of this, everyone else has spread out to the nickel slots and D's phone rings again. We find out that P is in fact safe, but now in a stairway sitting on a step on an unknown floor and unable to get up or out. I can't help but laugh my way into a chair and double up...I mean...A stairway....she can't get up off a stair??? BWWWHAHAHAHA.
I can now see the end of my participation at the end of the tunnel. D chats with her for a while and is confounded. No idea what to do, so she tells us she's going over to find her. "No you're not....we're not losing you for the day because your dumbass friend can't handle her liquor." I have a moment of clarity just then. "Call the IP, tell them what's up. They have cameras in those stairways. They'll find Courtney Foster Brooks and she's home free." Meanwhile P calls her husband in Phoenix as well, completely tilting him and he calls the police. She ends up falling asleep in the stairwell for just over an hour and a half as they all look for her, and finally they escort her to her room unharmed.
Aladdin Slots and the wait
===Tip of the day===
When playing nickel slots with women, if the women fill all the spots in a row of machines and you get stuck with a lame machine I.E.: "magic wand", "Ponies and Kitties", "Cupcakes in the Meadow" "Princess Daisy's dream" (you know what I'm saying....) DON'T DO IT....EVER. This is -EV every time.
As I learn this lesson on the slots, we are waiting for our buddies JG and PR to arrive via '32 coupe through the hot desert sun. They are about an hour away so the ladies start up the nickels...I don't know why, but I'm a sucker for these things. Cartoons that explode, Fish that talk, Monty Python, Austin Powers...I am under the spell.
Finally the boys arrive and we set out to start really drinking.....
Stay tuned for the next installment....Diablo meets the Planet of the Apes suite.....
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